It's just about time, if you ask us, for an armed Jedi rebellion in the UK. Being kicked out of Tesco and being attacked in your back garden by a piss-taking, drunk Darth Vader in a bin bag is repression enough.
Thankfully a company has come out with a real-life, working lightsabre. Next time a man in a bin bag invades your garden you can slice his arm right off - to avenge the end of Empire Strikes Back and also for trampling your magnolias - with the Spyder III Pro Arctic Laser.
It emits a 445nm blue, high powered 1W beam which shows up 4000 percent brighter than Sonar's 405nm beam, says Wicked Lasers on its product page here. The site brags that this laser "possesses the most burning capabilities of any portable laser in existence - that's why it's also the most dangerous laser ever created".
It can apparently "set fire quickly to skin and other body parts" and will "blind permanently and instantly". Awesome! It should spice-up lacklustre games of Laserquest in Hemel Hempstead, any road.
An unscrupulous madman has already set up a fatal MMA fighting spin-off with questionable legality in a faraway country where men hit each other in the face and body with electrified knuckledusters.
Just how long can it be until we see full on Sith/Jedi gladiator matches? With blinding, and burning.
man asks about a fee and Arti tells him that he loves to kill people
and will accept a token fee of a pound. The deal is done and the place
is set to Tesco on Friday lunchtime.
Arti awaits their arrival and follows them around the shop for a while
and then pounces on them, strangling them both with his bare hands. As
Arti runs out of the shop two security guards tackle him to the ground
and wait for the police. He is caught and tried for murder and found
guilty. The headline in the paper the next day read:
ARTI CHOKES TWO FOR A POUND AT TESCO
drashek he,he.
The reason is quite obvious. These lasers are dangerous, even at great distances. I sincerely doubt it can set human skin on fire, since it's moist and takes a lot of time to dry enough to get flammable. Maybe they are talking about skin sheddings.