Nokia has recognised that for it, there is only One Direction. But rather than understanding the only way it can go from rock bottom is "up", it got the Wrong Direction and hired some teenagers to promote some new dumb-phones.
Ignorance is bliss, but for the unaware One Direction is a manufactured pop group that fell out of Simon Cowell's cynical tear-jerking Christmas hit-churner, the X Factor, and it's the group that almost got Caitlin Moran placed on some sort of list.
Unlike other corners of the technology press, Nokia didn't bother to send us a review sample of the Syco boys' phone, but we did manage to glue a cut-out of H from Steps onto a 3110.
Anyway, Nokia must think including a pre-installed One Direction wallpaper is going to win over some teeny boppers and disinterest them from Angry Birds if just for a moment. We'll see how the launch goes, but the C2-02 and C3 are cheap and cheerful, and comes with five complimentary mop-heads in Topshop.
CNET's write-up (pro-click for Sunny Delight jokes) says the C2-02 has a two megapixel camera while the C3 has a very large keyboard. They're available for roughly £80 now from the Carphone Warehouse.
Nokia's lifeblood isn't, it told us at its Espoo, Finland HQ, in high-end superphones, it is in the so-called dumb phone for emerging markets. India and China are the very, very important markets, according to Nokia's Blanca Juti, where what it calls the "futurephones" are going down a storm.
Quite how One Direction will go down in Chamarajanagar is anyone's guess, but time will tell.